From the category: law

11 June 2025


Last weekend, our firm went to Palawan for our annual trip. I haven't been to the beach in such a long time, and unlike most people, I very much enjoy the "tour group" activities: island hopping, snorkeling, kayaking, boodle lunches, collectively panicking about forgetting your sunblock. It was a much-needed escape from emails, hearings, and clients who say, "Just a quick question." (It never is.) We stayed at an exclusive hotel resort by Sabang Beach, and despite the heavy overcast and eventual rains, it was such a great weekend.
 
The highlight for me was definitely the Puerto Princesa Underground River. It is a UNESCO World Heritage site, one I've been looking forward to seeing since our flights were booked a few months ago.

If you've never been, picture this: you’re in a small boat, ducking slightly as it glides into the yawning mouth of a cave. The air gets cooler. It’s dark. The only light comes from your boatman's flashlight. He swings it around, perfectly timed with the audio guide on your ear. The spotlight illuminates rock formations that, at first, look like, well, just rocks.
 
But then the soft, firm voice of the audio narrator says something like, "Look at this one -- it's the Holy Family." And suddenly, that oddly shaped cluster of stalactites does look like the nativity scene. Later on, they point to two dinosaurs. Vegetables. The Batcave. The hull of the Titanic. A supposedly naked woman. 

And from that point on, you can’t unsee them. The shapes reveal themselves, not because they changed, but because your perspective of them did.

Then, it hit me: this is exactly how law practice has felt after seven years.

In your first few years, everything looks like unformed rock. Dense, confusing, neutral. You know you’re supposed to make something out of it, but you don’t know what you’re looking at. You're dependent on someone else to point and say, “That? That’s a valid cause of action.” Or, “That clause? That's going to bite them in the ass.”

But over time, your flashlight steadies. Your eye adjusts. You learn to see the structures for yourself, the risk hiding in a client’s story, the subtle nuances in each argument, the case precedent no one noticed. Like those stalactites, it may not be obvious at first. But once you spot it, it’s unmistakable.

Also very much like law and jurisprudence: these limestone formations took centuries to build. Drip by drip. Case by case. Filing by painful filing. 

A goosebumps-inducing moment during the tour was when we stopped at supposedly the deepest part of the river tour, which was right below the highest point of the cave. We were under a 980-feet dome, and above 

I guess what I’m saying is, after Facebook reminded me that on the day of our Underground River tour, seven years ago, I took my oath as a lawyer before the Supreme Court justices, lawyering is part geology, part philosophy, and a lot of learning how to "see." And in the right light, even the hardest things can start to make sense.

Bonus: when you finally step out of the cave, there’s sunlight, sand, and the quiet satisfaction of knowing you’re not where you started.

And maybe a cold beer, if your bosses are feeling generous.

Happy seven years, self!




12 January 2022



For the first half of January, I was fortunate enough to be selected for the course titled “IP Strategies in Tech Industries," held in Silicon Valley, California.


We had to apply for this course last semester and the professor had to evaluate our credentials, as well as our personal essays, before being accepted into the class. The seminar aims to address recent IP issues in the tech field by going through the patent battles caused by converging technologies, such as the smartphone wars, automotive wars, and FRAND (fair, reasonable, and non-discriminatory) licensing terms. It also targets critical discussions on looming issues in the space of cloud wars, data privacy, and AI.


We were able to meet and learn from the chief legal counsels of Microsoft, Google, Facebook/Meta, Qualcomm, Samsung, Apple, and many others. This was under the tutelage of Prof. Micky Minhas, the director of our IP Center and the former general counsel of Microsoft. It was really an incredible and amazing experience because we got to meet the tech giants and personally ask them about legal and business strategies, as well as their career paths towards heading these companies. 


Everything I learned about patent law and technology licensing last semester came in handy for this course. Without that, I would have been twenty times more overwhelmed with our readings and assignments. But all that knowledge was upended by practical learnings as well. Coming into this, I thought patents per se are valuable to each company because they are obviously assets that can be commercialized. But this doesn't seem to be the case for big tech companies. Their portfolios are actually liabilities too: exposure to patent trolls, source of sunk costs due to litigation and maintenance fees, and a possible reason for bad PR. It was really an eye-opening course — one that challenged my preconceived notions, stock knowledge (or what little of it I had), and beliefs about the tech world. 




Not going to lie: over the holidays, I was greatly distressed about this seminar not pushing through because of the rising Omicron cases. Up until the last minute, we were told to standby for announcements in case things had to be canceled. Granted, flying to California would not have been a waste since I was able to spend Christmas with my aunt on my father's side and New Year with my aunt on my mother's side. Still, I was really looking forward to this trip and I would have been so bummed if, after 2 years of being forced to always go online, we had to resort to Zoom, even for understandable reasons.

Just to give you an idea of how impressive our speaker line-up was, these are the general counsels, chief IP counsels, and tech leaders that we were able to personally meet over the course of that week:
    • Mickey Minhas, formerly from Microsoft and Qualcomm (our professor and Director of the Franklin Pierce Center for Intellectual Property)
    • Allen Lo of Meta (Facebook)
    • Mike Lee of Google
    • JP Hong, formerly of Samsung and currently with Qualcomm
    • Krishna Sood of Microsoft
    • Jeff Lasker of Apple
    • Heath Hoglund of Dolby
    • Courtney Quish of Fortress IP Finance Group
    • Shawn Ambwani of Unified Patents
    • Rajiv Patel of Fenwick & West LLP
Hearing these lawyers talk before us was intimidating because 1) it felt like they were giving us Keynote speeches and 2) these are actually the industry freakin' leaders. These guys were at the forefront of major legal battles! I mean, our professor, the general counsel of Microsoft, actually squared off with the other speaker, formerly of Samsung, in real life!!! How amazing was that?

But it was also inspiring and incredibly riveting. It made me consider going in-house at a tech company, non-STEM background be damned! Their work, after all, rarely involves patent filings anyway. It's focused on balancing the interests of business and legal, and determining what will push the needle forward in terms of innovation and ingenuity. It also mostly involves cultivating a strong IP culture within the company, such that its trade secrets are kept confidential and its key people remain.

We had very interesting discussions on Microsoft v. Samsung, Fortress v. Unified, and of course, Apple v. Samsung — which literally divided the class. (I am, of course, forever and always, #TeamAndroid, and more specifically #TeamSamsung and #TeamMicrosoft!) The nuances in each side's arguments and defenses were so easy to gloss over as a young student who had a limited understanding of these concepts back when they were actually happening. But now that I am a little more familiar with the legal terrain, I can appreciate and learn from them. 




I feel like this course suddenly opened doors for me because aside from being able to personally network and connect with these chief IP counsels, it also made me realize the vast possibilities within the field of IP. Before taking on my LLM, I was just deadset on making a career on just copyright and trademarks alone. But now that I'm here, there is no reason to not explore and push myself out of my comfort zone if necessary in the future. 

I also really appreciated the fact that most of these tech leaders were Asians. It is a big deal because — let's face it — it can be hard to break into any industry when you're not white. Let alone when you are a woman. Life can be a series of closing doors when you don't have fair skin and a penis. Our speakers took the time to share their personal narratives and career advice aside from the substantial concepts, and I admire them for that. 

Anyway, here are a couple more photos from our Silicon Valley immersion. I sneaked in a few from our visit to the Google Campus too!


At Microsoft Campus with my Microsoft Surface Go :P #loyal


Lobby of the Microsoft SV Building

Silicon Valley at dusk

Some of us international/hybrid students

Thank you, Microsoft, for letting us in despite the threat of Omicron

Learning about Qualcomm's licensing strategy 

Can you find me on Google Maps?

I think this was actually someone's bike

Indeed.




16 September 2021


Signs of life: Yep, I'm finally here! A journey that started in 2018 now finally coming to fruition.
I'm officially an LLM in IP student! Hi, UNH Law!

It has been a while since I last wrote here, I know. I've always been meaning to but somehow as soon as everything started, time just whirred by so quickly. (As if we haven't been losing track of it since the pandemic again!)

I arrived in the US on July 30, after what seemed like a rollercoaster ride for the first half of 2021. I deferred admission from Fall of 2020, but even with situations improving in the US sometime during April, I still didn't allow myself to fully embrace the reality that enrollment will finally push through until I finally stepped off the plane.

It has been an exciting first two months to say the last. So far, since arriving, I've gone hiking, visited museums, published a paper, formed new friendships, and learned how much I don't know in the world of IP. 




Remember that old National Geographic tagline? "The more you know, the more you know you don't know." That has basically been the running theme of my life thus far. Every single day I find out about things I thought I already had enough working knowledge on and realize how much I have yet to discover.

This semester I'm taking Trademarks, Patent, Technology Licensing, Internet Law, and Art Law - all of which are incredibly interesting to me. I chose Trademarks because of the professor, Alexandra J. Roberts, who is basically one of the most well-known experts on US trademark law and the Lanham Act. She's well-regarded in the legal circles especially on Twitter, has been featured on numerous publications, and has been cited in a great number of scholarly articles. I'm so lucky she was also assigned as my Faculty Advisor. I'm looking forward to learning from her - and hopefully have her guide me through writing another paper, perhaps!

The actual emotional and mental journey to just get here is still astounding to me. I always have random moments of disbelief, because how could I ever have gotten here? If you told 2014 me that I would pursue further studies - and that I'd actually be good enough to get into a top 4 program - I would have thought you were making a mean, cruel joke. During the entirety of law school, I was anxious and deeply insecure. I couldn't think of a future where I could enjoy the law and the legal practice. "Is there even a space for me in the real world?" I'd often ask myself. And turns out, there is. I just had to go follow my interests and let them lead me to a field that I can actually, truly revel in.

So far, the main difference from law school in the Philippines? Here, it's a more relaxed, laidback classroom setting. Some professors do "cold calls" (their term for "recits") but it doesn't actually impact your performance in class; its sole purpose is to ensure that the discussion pushes forward. Because of this, there's less pressure in the daily grind and it's easier to enjoy going through the readings. The professors are also very sincere in wanting to help, and asking questions is highly encouraged. I don't think I've ever enjoyed reading cases as much as I have here; it's quite comparable to my undergrad experience, actually, where I take pleasure in actually burying myself in books and doing my homework. Which isn't to say the workload isn't heavy - in fact, only two months in and I'm already feeling slightly overwhelmed. But at least I'm genuinely having a good time poring over the readings. It's so refreshing, especially after the trauma of UP Law.

Anyway, I'm so excited about what lies ahead! I’m very thankful, grateful, and appreciative of my parents & loved ones, bosses, mentors, sisses in UP Portia, and friends who’ve encouraged and believed in me. I'm looking forward to learning more about the different aspects of IP and how each field can help shape our understanding of what it means to be IP practitioners. More importantly, I hope I can gain enough knowledge to carry back home, where my passion and experience can make a big difference. I've always said I’d love to make a big splash, a huge leap just before I turn 30. Well, I guess here goes. 💙




31 March 2021

Because of the ongoing pandemic (and last year's deferral), I decided to take my chances and apply to other universities for my LLM, despite believing that some of them may be quite a reach. While my heart was set on going to UNH Franklin Pierce because of its consistently top-ranked and renowned intellectual property law program, a part of me also wanted to see if I had a shot at other schools, if only to explore other options and satisfy my need for affirmation. (Insert insecurities caused by law school here.)

Realistically, I wanted to apply to California law schools because I might have a chance of defraying costs, considering the relatives living there. I have an aunt in San Francisco and we have close family friends in Los Angeles. I greatly enjoyed my last visit in 2017 and have always felt like I belonged more to the sunny West Coast.

But deep down, I wasn't sure if I'd even get in these schools. It's no secret that I did not excel that much in law school grades-wise, and I had a hard time coming to terms with that. Typical law school story: I was a consistent honor student from grade school to college, so to find myself in a place where everyone was so much better, the environment wasn't as encouraging, and the subjects were so terrifying certainly took some adjusting. But of course, I did manage, and I did survive. I found great, supportive, life-long friends (in my sorority, my block, and in different batches) who helped me hurdle four-and-a-half years.

And I did eventually stumble into a field I enjoy, enough that I now think I'm deserving of pursuing higher studies in it. Ha! Me, wanting to study more law? Crazy how it all turned out.

I'm happy to share that I got zero rejections in all the schools I applied to. I got accepted to University of Southern California, University of California Davis, and University of California Hastings. Even better, I was offered merit scholarships / Dean's Academic scholarships in all three law schools. To say that I was shocked would be an understatement. Me??! How did this happen!

In addition, I got waitlisted at UC Berkeley and UCLA, schools where I was a hundred percent sure that I will be rejected. I kept telling myself, before pressing the "Submit" button on LSAC, "Sayang lang application fee ko dito." For real. I could not believe that my application was even strong enough to merit being placed on the waiting list for these universities. I didn't get rejected! What!

(I also got accepted to Loyola Law School and Santa Clara University last year. Yay, Jesuits!)

My grades in law school were not stellar, but I'd like to believe that I made up for it with my "softs" - work experience, internships, and strong application letter. During law school, I actively pursued internships during the summers, including work for the Regional Trial Court and the Supreme Court. I'm certain our fourth-year internship for the UP Office of Legal Aid (OLA) and externship for the Office of the Government Corporate Counsel (OGCC) helped as well. This, on top of my work experience that focused specifically in IP and media law, and my teaching experience.

Perhaps more significantly, in my personal statement, I made sure to highlight my affinity for arts and literature. It was the reason why I mainly wanted to pursue IP. Outside law school and in practice, I kept writing, had a few articles published in magazines and newspapers, and continued to explore this pursuit. I honestly think this helped make my application stand out because it showed an aspect of me beyond academics. It also reinforced why I wanted to pursue an LLM in IP: I honestly wanted to make a significant impact in the Philippine literary, artistic, media, and entertainment landscape.

In the end, it just feels so good to have your work experience mean something. To receive confirmation that your output is impressive is much-needed, especially during this time. I admit that I could have chosen to no longer apply to these schools, especially since I already paid for my deposit to UNH last year anyway. But I guess I just really wanted that affirmation. Sue me. Law school was difficult, but it shouldn't be the end-all, be-all predictor of how our careers will turn out. We can flourish even more in the field, where our actual skills and expertise truly matter. 

It's worth pointing out Chief Justice Peralta's retirement speech from last week. “I was not a Bar top-notcher or an honor student. That is the truth. Unlike most Chief Justices before me, I was not an academic standout,” he said. Same. It's statistically impossible for everyone to stand out in law school or in the Bar. But our collective body of work outside law school - and even outside the legal practice - should say so much more about who we are as professionals, and ultimately, as people. I don't think I can claim to be as brilliant as some of my (very) impressive schoolmates and peers (all of whom I hold in high regard; they know who they are!) But as far as my own personal goals are concerned, I'm happily and luckily getting at them, slowly but surely. 

I would have loved to go to any of these prestigious universities, and right now nothing is quite final yet (still waiting on scholarship negotiations), although I'm really leaning towards going to UNH Franklin Pierce this fall. The cost of studying in the US is steep, and their generous scholarship offer will realistically allow me to pursue my LLM this year. They're also the only university among my choices which offers a specific LLM in IP. Not to mention, it really was the school I intended on going to in the first place. My boss and mentor went there in 1993 and encouraged me to apply. His recommendation as an alumnus helped land me an additional financial grant from the university. They're also a consistently top-ranked school for IP in the last 30 years. Just yesterday they rose in ranking to be #4 in the US for IP, from last year's #5. (Google "Top IP law schools" and they always come up.) I really could not pass up that chance. 

But I'm keeping the admission letters below to remind myself that I'm so much better than my transcripts. That some professors were wrong to write me off. (Is this my villain origin story? Yes. No. Maybe. Lol.) That I'm doing something right and going in the right direction. And that the sky's the limit, even for regular, non-genius, jowa-over-GWA, slightly kalat girls like me. 

You just have to try.

*

11 February 2021


My third anniversary in the office is coming up (tomorrow, to be exact), and it just dawned on me that I haven't exactly written about my work life. Not in my old blog, and not even in my personal journal. I've shared snippets of it on Twitter, my LinkedIn profile is pretty transparent, and surely most people in my circles are aware of the kind of work I do. But it never really occurred to me to really write about what I do for a living - and more importantly, why.


I suppose it's mostly because I don't want to come off as pretentious. People who only talk about their work can come off as insufferable. Especially when they claim to be experts at what they do. And I still feel like there is so much I don't know, so what right do I have to be writing about it?


Then again, it's not as if I'm going to be throwing out random legal advice into the ether. Describing the job - and really thinking about why I'm in it - is certainly worth making some room for, even in my small corner in the digital space. After all, it's almost three years now. Milestones are milestones, and they're worth writing about, aren't they?


Being in intellectual property wasn't something I planned on before I entered law school, and it wasn't even something I considered in law school. Before my fifth year of law, I was dead set on applying at the Supreme Court, particularly in the office of then-Chief Justice Sereno, where I interned that previous summer. But we all knew how things turned out, and by the time I finished taking the Bar, they were no longer taking in new applicants, given the uncertainty of the situation. As such, I was forced to consider the more "traditional" route, i.e. firm life. 


I did enjoy IP in law school, in large part due to my professor (and one of our sorority's most esteemed alumni). Something about it made sense to me, mostly due to my undergrad. CAL taught me to value the artistic and creative integrity that comes with each piece of art, innovation, or technology. And considering that I was in deep denial about no longer being a literature major for the entirety of law school, taking this path felt like coming home in many ways.


My law school thesis was actually on fair use. And the topic was serendipitous, in that, all the pieces wouldn't have come together had it not been for my background. One desperate, fateful night in 2016, just a few hours before the deadline for submission of initial thesis proposal topics, I came across several Facebook posts (and links to some blog posts) about an ongoing copyright issue with one writer and one local publishing house. (The writers on both sides included professors from our department.) It was a very interesting, unique, and novel issue on copyright, fair use, criticism, and appropriation of literary works, and one that I had a unique viewpoint from which to see the action.


Two years later, it got published in the Philippine Law Journal. And that very same thesis also landed me my current job. During my interview, one of the partners asked me about my thesis. It caught me a bit off-guard, since none of the firms I previously applied for asked about it. I went into great detail about the topic, arguing passionately for the writer/artist. In another twist of fate, turns out, this law firm represented the publisher! I was so sure I would not get the offer, considering my stand. I walked out of there thinking, "Okay time to search for other IP firms!!!" But I got invited to a second interview, and was eventually given an offer.


And now here we are. To borrow from another great KB (Kate Beckinsale, in Serendipity): a fortunate accident.


Since then, I've handled cases on copyright, trademark, and patent enforcement and litigation. I am also assigned work that deals with the policy aspect of intellectual property. We assist in the drafting of university and institutional IP policies and agreements, as well as give advice on certain government-funded technology projects. I also do contract reviews and provide legal opinions on franchising and licensing agreements, artist/producer/director contracts, and other IP related matters. We handle local and foreign clients, and we provide opinions on a variety of novel issues. You'd be surprised at how much IP intersects with a lot of other fields.


Last November 2019, I was selected by my firm as a delegate for the Licensing Executives Society (LES) Young Members’ Circle Asia-Pacific Conference in Seoul, South Korea, where I learned more about global licensing particularly on beauty, healthcare, telecommunications, big data, artificial intelligence, and entertainment. It was such a privilege to have been selected to attend that short conference. I got to meet other IP practitioners from Manila, and all over the world. But I'm not going to lie, my favorite part of the whole thing was the fellowship with other attendees. We all went to a cozy, underground jazz bar and drank all night. (All while trying to squeeze trite trademark-related jokes in between.) It was a blast. 


Something I'm most proud of during quarantine was being part of the Technical Working Group in the Supreme Court that worked on the amendments to the Rules of Procedure on Intellectual Property Rights Cases. One of our partners was part of the TWG, and he tagged me along. Before the start of the pandemic, we would regularly attend meetings at either the IPO or the SC. And during quarantine, we had bi-weekly Zoom meets to discuss, go through, and align all provisions and proposed amendments. Since my boss was the expert private practitioner in the group (even the justices deferred to him on some matters), we worked double-time on ironing out the kinks, while consulting other laws and even rules from other jurisdictions. And yes, even on weekends. But it was so satisfying because it felt like a significant contribution to the practice. I have to admit, I cried a bit when the Rules were finally published on the newspaper. My name wasn't there (my boss' was though), but deep down, I was like, "I helped!!!" 


And just this week, our boss again tagged me along to join him as part of a TWG in Congress, this time for the amendments of the IP Code itself. I can anticipate a pretty long, gruesome, and thorough process again. But it all sounds exciting. 


Exciting. I guess that's the important keyword right? The last twelve months have been stressful as f*ck. For about two-thirds of 2020, we were only two associates. (Two resigned pre-pandemic.) There were days when I'd literally cry myself to sleep, then cry myself awake. Highly unusual for masandal-tulog, parang-mantika-matulog me. But... I don't know. I still very much enjoy the work. As much as I hate litigation (I really do; but my frustrations about it are for another post altogether), I still like everything else I'm doing.


I like doing what I do. Which isn't saying a lot for most people. A friend once told me that your mission is where your deep happiness meets a deep hunger of the world. I don't know if I'm at a point in my life where I can say that about being a lawyer. Or this practice, even. The truth is, I've never fallen in love with lawyering the way everybody - including myself - expected. I crawled my way out of law school, desperate for affirmation, lost as to purpose. But somehow, surprisingly, I managed to find a good, comfortable place that I actually like. Me, liking the intricacies of the law? Who would've thought? Maybe I'll be elsewhere years from now. Maybe I'll come across a field or a job that is truly representative of all my interests (and that does not involve appearing in court). Maybe not. But right now, I still like this.


And maybe that's a good thing.


21 January 2021

"When day comes, we ask ourselves
where can we find light in this never-ending shade?"


I had no intention of staying up until two in the morning to finish checking final exam papers, but I tuned in to Joe Biden's inauguration and decided to watch until the end. Something about going through my students' answers on legality, moral justification, Dworkin's hard cases, and MLK's nonviolent direct action made me realize how important it is to be reminded that for our institutions to work, we must not lose sight of people. Actual people. Citizens are not some abstract concept — our laws affect us directly. Words have a tangible effect on us. When leaders see their constituents as humans, rather than mere pawns, change - the good kind - can happen. 

*

I've had the privilege of being invited to teach at the University of Makati School of Law last semester. I taught Philosophy of Law to wide-eyed and eager first years. I was just as eager. More than just teaching them the law, I felt it was important to impart the wisdom behind it — especially given everything that's happening. Why do we need it? How can it be used for the greater good? And to what extent should it shape our lives? A lot of people treat the law as merely a weapon: it has the power to command, to sanction, to delineate. But, again, in practice, when you go to the courts, and you see actual people on the receiving end of these words, you realize that these laws don't exist in a vacuum. They affect people in a real way. When drafted haphazardly or when applied irresponsibly, it is incredibly damaging. But when used for good, it can help heal.

The class was receptive and responsive to these concepts, mostly because of their diverse backgrounds. The block had a former criminology student, a radio journalist, working parents, media practitioners, government employees, accountants, members of the LGBT, fresh college graduates, breadwinners — all walks of life, from different parts of the country. It was a good learning experience for me as well. I discussed the readings I assigned through the lens of my own experience. But most of them were able to process them through interesting and more meaningful angles. Listening to their perspectives every meeting was confirmation that the profession thrives with diversity. The law is enriched when we consider the input of people coming from different backgrounds. Finding a more equitable common ground is only possible when we consider the concerns of many, and not just the select few. 

Most striking to me, though, was how earnest they seemed in just wanting to be good and to do good. Since the time I graduated from law school, things have gotten much worse. And I cannot imagine the exhaustion and hopelessness they must feel having to learn about these concepts at a time like this. Instead of feeling discouraged, however, I felt the desire — even the desperation — to want to do well so that they can contribute in some way, somehow, in the future. Discussions with other faculty members also echoed the same sentiments: they're really trying. The dire circumstances of this administration weigh heavily on all of us. Everyone is suffering and being apathetic is just not going to cut it. If there's a silver lining to all this, it's that more and more people are realizing that things have to change. And they want to play a part in doing that. 

*

I read Joe Biden's book, "Promise Me, Dad," last year, mostly in the dark, during a power outage caused by a typhoon. To be honest, I had no real investment in his campaign or career prior to that. And even after having read it, I don't think I have a complete picture of who he is as a politician. (It is, after all, a memoir, so much of the narration has to be taken with a grain of salt since he's telling his version of events from 2013 to 2015 — of course, he had to downplay some conflicts and play up others.) The book covered only a very limited period of his life: during the last few years of his vice presidency, when he was dealing with his son Beau's cancer diagnosis, handling matters regarding Iraq, Russia, and Crimea, and considering whether he was going to run for the 2016 presidential elections. But it was a good distillation of who he was, essentially: a person who has grappled with sorrow and defeat — many times and in many ways. 

Biden survived the death of his first wife and baby daughter, raising his two toddlers who survived that car crash, losing Democratic primaries, not being endorsed by the President, and having his eldest son succumb to cancer. He had to loan from Obama for his son's medical bills, he overcame a stutter as a child, he was not a particularly excellent law student (#relate). He wasn't, by any means, a brilliant guy. Maybe I'll always have a bias towards people who have swum through the depths of grief. Maybe I'll always wear grief on my sleeve, or like a small flag brooch pinned to my emotional lapel. But there's a reason for me to believe that he is likely to lead well because he's no stranger to struggle. He knows how to listen. He certainly can't change US politics (their history is much too tarnished for any one person to ever change their legacy). And we still need to be vigilant about how their policies greatly impact other countries, including our own. But in times like these, even though the bar is so low, his capacity for compassion isn't such a bad thing. 

I really wish the Philippines follows suit soon. The shamelessness, the duplicity, the corruption of this administration in the middle of a pandemic — it's sickening and terrifying. I can't wait for us to see the light at the end of the tunnel. It still seems so implausible. But I can't help but feel hope. We have to. It can't be that far off, can it?

*

Triteness notwithstanding, I honestly believe that the most important thing to teach law students is the notion that knowing the law places you in a position to help. Ironic, since law school tends to attract the self-absorbed, pompous, power-hungry types. But it shouldn't be that way. And even if it were, it should change their perspective. 

It was serendipitous that I got assigned to teach that subject. Preparing the syllabus meant I had to go through different readings and reacquaint myself with these concepts again (which, if we're being honest, slipped through the cracks of my mind when I was taking this subject in my first-year law). While the teaching environment this semester was challenging, it also opened more opportunities for me to converse with students in a less stringent way. During the first day of class, most of them were honest about their personal struggles, as well as their feelings of intimidation regarding a philosophy subject. But it was encouraging to me that these students responded well to the syllabus, and that, as shown by their performance in class, they were able to grasp early on that the stability of our institutions depends on how well our laws are upheld and to what extent they bend towards justice and equity. 

*

The rest of the climb still seems steep and daunting. I honestly don't see 2021 being that much different from 2020. It will take years, maybe decades, before the damage of bad leadership is undone. (Duterte is a monster.) But hopefully, it will come sooner than later. I have to trust that it will happen if only to keep myself afloat. Teaching certainly helped: if I could instill that in my students, I could certainly make myself believe that too. And if they can make me believe that there are so many people out there who want to learn more to be able to do more good, then there's reason to hold out hope. 

Wishing that the words by Amanda Gorman, the young 22-year-old poet laureate who spoke during the inauguration, can serve as both a compass and an affirmation:


"But while democracy can be periodically delayed,
it can never be permanently defeated.
In this truth, in this faith, we trust."

— The Hill We Climb by Amanda Gorman


(P.S. And here's to hoping it will take the art, the poetry, and the optimism of the young — our generation — to steer us towards better days too.)

29 August 2020



I received a postcard from Concord, New Hampshire the other day. 

It was from another graduate student from the LLM program I got admitted to. We got in touch through the law school's admissions office via email a few months ago, before the reality of deferral dawned on me, and before their classes, exams, and eventual graduation were all moved online. To reach out to prospective students is already a thoughtful gesture, but to send an actual, physical letter just to say hi and to make us feel welcome? It shouldn't feel like much, but given the current circumstances, it's well-received and appreciated.

It feels like my admission was a lifetime ago. April — and the rest of the year — slipped by so quickly. So many devastating, troubling, and concerning things have happened since then. While it was something I wanted so badly to celebrate, it just didn't feel right then. And it still doesn't feel right now. 

The pandemic has deprived us the opportunity to process things the way we know how. It has shifted, and is still shifting, the ground on which our old lives have taken root. About a month ago, a lola who lived a street away from us passed away on my uncle's death anniversary. This grandma, though not our relative, was always present in most of our family's gatherings and milestones. Her children are aunts and uncles to me. I'd always drop by their house every Christmas. She'd join my other lolas in fetching me on Sundays after bar review. 

How do we grieve without having gotten the chance to say goodbye? How do we comfort others without the benefit of touch? How do we carry the burden of sadness, on top of the toll of uncertainty? And on the other hand, how do we even make room for celebration of our own small victories? It feels paralyzing, trying to navigate through our emotions with all this going on. Our feelings both feel unimportant but burdensome at the same time.

I'm reminded I'm reminded of this essay I read by Andrea Pitzer, an American journalist, and her journey along the Arctic to trace the last voyage of polar explorer William Barents. His crew was attempting to find passage to China; meanwhile, Andrea was trying to navigate through a personal crisis.

While on her trip, her cousin Joe had died. During the remainder of the voyage, she had to deal with the reality of his sudden absence. It was shocking and sad: he was suddenly gone, his PTSD, his terrible jokes, his alcoholism, his love for many people - all of it. "He's already been gone for more than a week, while I was out in the Arctic, heedless of his disintegration," Pitzer writes.

Needless to say, while the primary purpose of Pitzer's voyage was to retrace the final steps of Barents and his crew, their ship soon became ground zero for Pitzer's feelings of regret, shame, and sadness. On top of the list: she saw for herself how the Arctic sea is collapsing, with few signs of reversal. Her family seemed equally vulnerable following Joe's demise, her father and stepfather's cancer diagnoses, and her mother's worsening dementia. In addition, she left back home a husband working full-time, with his hands full as he takes care of their two teenage children. She also has to have her book on Barents out by Christmas.

"I feel both grateful and ashamed to have a chance to go off the grid to focus on research. I’m running from looming family mortality into the arms of historic—and historical—tragedy. Part of me thinks I shouldn’t go. But I know it might be the journey of a lifetime."

This is exactly how I felt about being granted admission to 3 universities a few months ago. I already deferred until next year, knowing full well that I will forfeit my admission if circumstances don't allow me to enroll by next year. Will things be okay by then? Will I be in a better position to chase after something very personal, to be thinking solely of myself? I have no idea. There's this loud voice inside my head saying I may not be able to go, knowing full well that we may not have enough resources to send me to the other side of the world with only, at most, a 60% scholarship. More so, it just feels preposterous to be leaving my family behind during a very turbulent, vulnerable time to go to a country that is just as chaotic and troubling.

But I cannot not go. 

"The future we’re digging for ourselves is at the bottom of a cliff that grows higher every day. But that’s not the same as saying nothing can be done. There are eggs to fry. There is history to remember and glaciers to measure. There is trash to count. 

So much is already going or gone. But what’s still there is vast, stupendous."

I suppose the only way out of this is through. And despite how bleak everything seems at the moment, we have to believe that wonders will keep coming, day by day.Things will get better, things will get better, things will get better. Repeat until it takes root in our soul; repeat until it actually happens. I'll set out to sail one day soon; I have to, I will. Until then, I'll do what I can here, on deck, despite being surrounded by endless water.


"I’ve come back to say that this place is singing a love song. It may be shot through with grief and danger, but if you’re listening and you can hear this, it means we’re not dead yet."

01 May 2020





Good things come in threes! Is life imitating art and living out The Rule of Threes? Look at that, I also got accepted at Santa Clara University for their LLM in Intellectual Property! And I was named a Silicon Valley Law Fellow too and awarded a $1,500 scholarship.

SCU Law is also named as one of the top law schools for intellectual property (along with UNH Franklin Pierce), especially because it is located at Silicon Valley, the heart of tech and innovation. Worthy of note is that like Loyola Law, SCU is also a Jesuit-run university. Interestingly enough, the last few weeks I have been doing mostly Ateneo-related work for our firm. Is this a sign? Hmm.

Since I've talked about synchronicities in my previous post, I think it's worth mentioning that my name was supposed to be Clara / Klara. My mom prayed to St. Claire  before her pregnancy (yes, the saint women pray and dance to at Obando, Bulacan) and also loved the lead character from the Nutcracker ballet, Clara. Ultimately she went with Karla instead (partly because I would have been teased endlessly if I was a "Maria Clara"), but I've always felt an affinity towards her, especially because in recent years I've grown to appreciate her friendship with St. Francis. Maybe it's the universe poking fun at me again - "Thought I was over with all the coincidences? Just you wait!"

To be honest, I'm still feeling pretty overwhelmed about all this. I applied for LLM at the start of the year out of a desire to learn more about IP, yes, but also I just wanted to try something different, to do something out of the ordinary. Consider it a post-New Year dare to myself. I had zero expectations of getting admitted to any of these schools, let alone be granted scholarships. Based on my conversations with some friends in the profession, international schools usually prefer lawyers working in the Government. I went ahead and tried just to see if I had a chance; if I didn't get accepted then maybe it isn't for me yet (or maybe I really did have to resign and work for a Government office, haha). But to have gotten such a remarkable response - and three times, at that - is truly quite mind-boggling. Loyola, UNH, and now SCU. Wild.

Now, I still have not decided where I will end up going. (I'm still weighing many factors, including costs.) In fact, I'm seriously considering deferring my enrollment to the next school year, given the pandemic situation. I don't think things will get settled in time for me to fully arrange my visa, look for housing, and prepare for other considerations when things are still very much uncertain, both here and in the US. But it's a relief to know that there really is something to look forward to after all this. The scholarships will not be forfeited despite deferral so the metaphorical doors are not being closed on me.

It's hard to wrestle with the idea of celebrating at a time like this. Instead of leaving this August, I have to put my plans on hold until next year. But as always, I need to remind myself that detours are not without purpose. This whole pandemic has brought out some of my worst fears about the government. Amazingly, it has shown us the resilience, compassion, and kindness of a lot of our citizens too. And it's beyond inspiring. All these dreams of studying abroad are just that - wanting to experience an education in another country. Never for a second did I imagine myself leaving this place for good, even and especially now. We need voices of dissent to be amplified - to ring louder and braver each day. These voices - including my own - may get tired, but we have to continuously find ways to keep going, to continue being of service. To give back. To seek the light at the end of the tunnel.

It's there.




29 April 2020

Taken sometime in April 2018, a few days after our results came out, when I claimed my bar clearance and set my schedule for Roll Signing.


It's still quite surreal to realize that it's been two years since our bar results came out. Every time it gets mentioned, my muscles tense up and my brain blanks out. (Talk about post-traumatic stress.) Considering the amount of pressure we all had to endure in the years leading up to our own bar exams, the feeling of anxiousness remains. I guess one never fully recovers from the experience of being at the mercy of such a long, arduous exam. Every year, even after your own results, you will find yourself saying, "Wow, lives are going to be changed today."

On the day of our bar's release, my mom, grandparents, and I went to Mass at Baclaran Church, in an attempt to make a final, desperate plea to God, Mama Mary, all the angels and saints. But the Mass finished at 10:00, and the results are coming out at noon, so there was still a long and agonizing two-hour wait. My grandma, as if on cue, decided they needed to buy some groceries, so off to S&R Macapagal we went. For the next hour or so, we all pretended to care about wholesale deals and rotisserie chicken. 

At around 11:30, somewhere along the aisle of bread and pastries, my mom received a call. It was from a family friend affiliated with the Supreme Court. She put it on speaker phone for the entire family (and quite frankly, that entire row of shelves) to hear:

"She passed! Her name is on the list."

And thus began what seemed like the longest, most bizarre, time-warping, continuum-shattering minute of my life, all while jumping, skipping, and hopping - in a dress. I could not believe it. I made it.

Minutes later, my phone got flooded with call, texts, and messages. The rest of the day went by like a blur. (The only other thing I could remember was the Razon's Halo-Halo they treated me to after shopping at S&R. It was the best reward/comfort food I could have asked for.)

Nothing has been the same since.

Life as a lawyer thus far has had its ups and downs. Some days are slow, some days are exciting; no two days are ever alike. I still doubt myself sometimes, and often feel like I'm still much closer to my wide-eyed, anxious bar reviewer self than some version of a confident, aggressive attorney. But I'm quite happy. Since then, I've appeared in court, reviewed contracts, prepared pleadings, attended search warrant enforcements, drafted university IP policies, and even got to teach. So many great things have happened since that day, and much of my families' prayers were answered on that fateful Thursday afternoon.

Two years ago, on April 26, our bar results came out. I took the bar and passed the bar at 26 years old. My birthday is also on the 26th (of October). On the list, I was bar passer 242 too. 24+2 = 26.





And interestingly enough, World Intellectual Property Day is celebrated on April 26.

Synchronicities are peculiar. I've never been one to anchor my fate on numbers, and I'm not sure if there really is a grand design to all this - but I'm inclined to think perhaps life gives us these patterns to remind us to trust in the Universe and its mysterious ways, and to always just believe that maybe, just maybe, some things are really meant to be. We just have to wait and let them unfold.

Happy anniversary, self! ❤


*


Today, thousands await the results of the 2019 bar exams.

For any #Bar2019 hopeful who might come across this blog: Whatever the outcome, your lives will be changed for good today. I hope this day will constantly remind you to remain humble, to always be of service, and to keep fighting.

Remember that you survived law school, hurdled bar review, and successfully took on all four Sundays of the bar exam. Those were all seemingly insurmountable, but you managed. Today's results are not an affirmation of your capability to overcome hardship. You already did! Trust me, ALL the experiences & lessons you learned in the last four to five years are what will help define the kind of lawyer you will be, not just the bar.

So when you do get admitted to the practice, don't stop reminding yourself that you are worth more than just an exam. Cheering for all of you! Claim it. Life can only get better from here on out.

 There's still so much more to learn, to do, and to achieve. Today is just the beginning. ðŸŒ»ðŸŒ»ðŸŒ» 

Sparkles

Sparkles



01 April 2020

It's supposed to be April Fool's but to most of us, it's still just Day 16. Another day to try to work from home, respond to e-mails, rant against the government, get riled up because of the lack of action, foresight, urgency, and transparency, and feel helpless about it all. You know, the new normal.

But I suppose the Universe simply cannot let this day pass without a little side-serving of another plot twist.


I have just been admitted to the University of New Hampshire Franklin Pierce School of Law, with a Presidential Scholarship! This is beyond unbelievable! UNH Franklin Pierce has a very competitive IP law program. It is currently ranked as Top 5 for IP and Technology Law by the US News and World Report. It is also consistently ranked as one of the best universities for IP all over the world. The fact that I was accepted at all - and granted a scholarship - is still something I cannot wrap my head around. Similar to LMU Loyola Law School, the financial aid was granted based on their evaluation of my personal essay and application. I feel so thrilled and overwhelmed!

I applied to this university because one of the partners in our office was a graduate of Franklin Pierce as well. When I looked into the credentials of the school, I was truly impressed and in awe. Add to the fact the tiny feeling of glee that the campus looked majestic and was what my teenage WASP-y New England dreams were made of.

Then, of course, it only took a few minutes of elation for reality to sink in. The coronavirus is still here. Worse, our government's incompetence and inaction revealed itself in the most damning of ways (well that's always been the case, but now was the worst possible time), and at the expense of many people's lives. The President continues to see violence as the solution to a virus. Government officials still perpetuate bureaucracy, red tape, and politics. Meanwhile, people are sick, people are hungry, people are dying. And the rest of us who want to help are limited by the quarantine. The frustration, the rage, the inability to actually do something - it's paralyzing.

Even after receiving my acceptance from LMU and up until today with this one from UNH, I still can't feel completely elated. This whole pandemic is unprecedented, at least in our time. It's impossible to isolate yourself from what is happening beyond the comforts of your home, in fact, it has made every conflict outside seem personal. It's so difficult to celebrate personal victories at a time like this. It's like in the bigger scheme of things, your wins don't matter. All these acceptance letters are of course great news, but all the uncertainty about the state of affairs in the country (and in other parts of the world) is making me feel like... this isn't deserved? Especially during a crisis. How do we convince ourselves to embrace these joys when other people are suffering?

It's so hard to see things from a big picture kind of perspective when the present is in such chaos. We feel helpless, powerless; all our work is rendered meaningless.

Incidentally, the other day, I came across an honest, moving essay by Sarah Miller on Longreads about dealing with our feelings in a world saddled with pandemic, climate change, divisiveness and other modern horrors. The reality we live in now seems too bleak, that it seems like our own personal feelings and aspirations have to be pushed aside:

You may have been told all your life that there were certain things you needed and certain things you needed to do, but it turns out that you don’t need most of those things and you don’t really need to do anything. In fact, nothing would be better for the world right now than if we all stopped trying to achieve things and said, “We no longer believe work will set us free, it is the opposite, in fact,” and behaved accordingly. There is nothing to achieve right now except to insist that the only achievement is caring for others, and not caring specially for family or friends, but in caring for every person as our family or friend.

To feel empathy for others is what's most crucial right now. It is primarily the lack of compassion that has brought our country to where it is right now, a sinking ship led by a drunk captain who drove right into an iceberg. It is the inability to see every single person as human, and therefore deserving of basic human rights and needs, that makes the rhetoric of violence resonate to so many. And it's infuriating.

But then, I also see the collective efforts of many others - health workers, front liners, universities, private corporations, regular citizens - who are all stepping up and making up for the government's indifference. Ordinary people are doing all that they can to help and loudly voicing out their dissent. And it's slowly working. It's nothing short of empowering. Despite the despair we all feel given the undeserved idolatry of some people towards the President, there's also consolation in the fact that there are more people becoming more dissatisfied and angry. Our righteous anger has now become loud enough to cause some changes. When rage fuels action, and action results in goodness, it becomes a little easier to still feel hopeful.

Susan Krawitz, attempts to find that flicker of hope amidst a pandemic, and stumbles upon it in nature. In what she believed was marshy soil on familiar land appeared something surprising: a sugar maple. Nature was thriving in mysterious ways.

There are no answers right now to anything, only questions on questions. But the forsythia is beginning to bloom, and house wrens are singing. It’s time for woodcocks to start mating in the marshy meadows, and comfortingly, they are. And I just found two [sugar maple] trees that live in my woodlot in defiance of all experts and odds.

Maybe these wins are my sugar maples. To borrow from Krawitz, I have lived on this land for 28 years and thought I knew every cranny of it.  I have survived on this country 28 years and when someone tells me "This is all you are, this is all you will be," I believed them. But I have lived on this earth for 28 years, and in that time, life has always made clear to me that nothing is ever permanent. Things can get really bad, but they can get really good too. We just have to hold on to that tiny bit of humanity left in us and try to do as much as we can, in order to keep on going.

I listen to the news, but I also listen to nature, and what it’s telling me right now is this: we can’t see everything there is to see. We don’t always know all we think we know. And the very last thing we should ever give up is the possibility of miracles.

There is a light at the end of this tunnel. I just have to keep telling myself that. Today, I can be grateful for what lies ahead. But until then, I have to do my part in keeping whatever sanity left in me intact, and do as much good as I can, so everyone else - not just myself - can claim more victories n the future.

What choice do we have other than hope for the best? Hope that our personal triumphs anchor us and keep us afloat. These things, they are an affirmation of what we are capable of. They matter. They do, and they should, if only because they let us carry on, with hopefully the belief that we can bring more good into the world. Not just one day, but soon.




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